Horcrux
by Swamp-Eyes
Summary: [ONESHOT] Strange love confession, strange reply, strange debate on the perfect number.. [Sirius♥Lily]


**Horcrux**

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So fuck you  
And your untouchable face  
And fuck you  
For existing in the first place  
And who am I  
That I should be vying for your touch  
And who am I  
I bet you can't even tell me that much

(A.DiFranco)

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-I love you.. - Lily was blurting out something like that, at least, and in addition to it, Sirius wasn't even sure whether that was the first or the second time she pronounced those words.

Now that was strange.

They were alone in the corridor, almost all the rest of Hogwarts sleeping around them. Lily had told him she had to tell him something, had set an appointment in her usual hurried way (although, honestly, now that he was recollecting it, she _had _been more upset than ever, that evening, not eating and all that sort of things). But he had taken for sure that she couldn't but want to tell him something concerning James, somehow. That's why turning upside down his whole mental disposition was now so hard.

Sirius Black tried to concentrate.  
Lily Evans, the perpetual arrogant I-know-everything red-haired girl, on whom he had been hitting without the slightest sign of success for ages (even if, actually, it had been just for fun), was now in front of him, quite near to be precise, so near that he could smell her scent, her fiery head so unusually low, proclaiming, _of all things_, that she _loved _him.

Well, he found actually nothing strange in the fact that a girl loved him, neither in the fact that the girl was confessing it. By the way, modesty apart, he was the most desired boy of Hogwarts. What was strange, was the fact that the girl in matter was _Lily Evans_, who (the irony in it..) happened to be the girlfriend of one of his best friends, James Potter. And their relationship _wasn't _just a stupid adventure: they had been together for several months, and they seemed to look so good as a couple that Sirius could guess that they would end up _marrying_.  
"Now this really comes out of nothing! Stupid women…" Sirius thought cynically while peering at Lily.

At the sight of her looking back at him rather expectantly, Sirius bit his lips and realised he found the situation quite funny. So he burst out into laughter, running his bony hand trough his wonderful black hair, still looking at Lily who was now totally embarrassed.

-You… you _love _me? - he asked back cruelly and rhetorically. He was still laughing, and this was enough to make Lily furious. Scrutinizing her now icy face, Sirius moved closer to her, looking more amused than he really was. Actually, he was starting to feel rather strange.

- Now, Evans.. - he continued, since she wasn't speaking - Have I been living in an alternate universe for the last…uhm.. Let me think, _six months _I guess, or _are _you James Potter's girlfriend?

At this remark, Lily stared at Sirius as she was going to slap him. And if he had known how close she had been to doing it, he would have stepped one meter back.  
- I _am _James' girlfriend.- she replied almost exasperated. "But you _must _have been living in an alternate universe not to notice that I love you.." she added this just in her mind.

Surely, at this point at least there wasn't any embarrassment between them, because Lily was mad, and Sirius was astonished.

- So why the hell are you _here _telling me you _love _me! That's pure madness, and that's noxious, you know? - now there were symptoms of agitation in Sirius' voice. - Listen, Evans, I don't know what you are planning to do right here this evening, but I reckon this all _has _to be a stupid joke, even if you are one of the persons with the most _abysmal _sense of humour I've ever known. And now, good night.

After having said this, Sirius waved at her, and turned on his heel, showing her his back. Clearly his intention was to go away pretending he had never heard anything.

Of course, that was quite a stupid deed, that turned Lily even more angry.

Sirius hadn't the time to make a few steps, that she grabbed his arm fiercely, making him turn back to her. She observed his handsome and untouchable face for a few moments before slapping him. _Hard_.

That left him completely dumbfounded. He quickly withdrew his arm from her grip, extracting his wand. For a moment he feared that Lily could jinx him with some wicked spell, seeing how furious she was. Instead, now they were both stunned at each other.

- What are doing with _that_? - she asked raising her voice - Are you going to jinx me just because I _slapped _you?

Sirius lowered his wand.  
-I thought _you _were going to do that! - he replied, while massaging his hit cheek.

-Oh, hell, Black! I would never jinx you.. - she said to him quite resigned, lowering her head, a shade of pink on her face.

For the first time, he realised how serious she had been while saying _what-she-had-previously-said_ (it was so strange repeating it even in his mind… ) and how incorrectly he had behaved towards her. But Lily Evans loving _him_!  
"Do _not _repeat _that_, hell!" he told to himself.  
Despite becoming more and more conscious of the innumerable problems this situation could pull out, Sirius couldn't manage to be serious.  
- Oh, how very kind of you, you would never _jinx _me! But, guess what, you just _slapped _me! - he said sarcastically. - Or maybe that doesn't count!

And with this remark, Sirius had just gained himself another slap. _Harder _than the first one.

The pain actually distracted him from the situation for a few moments. But then he looked around, to be sure none was witnessing what was happening. Two slaps from Lily Evans was nothing to be very proud of…

- Ah, _of course_! - Lily seemed to have noticed Sirius' attitude. - Look around, make sure none has seen us! Quite a shame if one of your little bitches has seen _me_, the little annoying _Pottergirl, _slapping a _celebrity _like you! - she was totally livid, now.- You know what, Black? _Fuck you and your untouchable face_!

For a moment, Sirius raised his arm before his face, having the suspicion she was going to slap him again.

But Lily just began walking away with a tired snort.

In the very moment he saw Lily's red hair waving on her back, he understood that, for some obscure reasons, he didn't want at all Lily leaving that place.

-Wait, Evans!

Sirius flung himself towards her, first pulling her abruptly so that he could see her bewildered expression, then taking her face with both his hands.  
She instantly grabbed his wrists trying to get rid of his hold, and opened her mouth to protest, frowning.

- Now you just shut up, _my little Lily_… - Sirius began before she could have said a single word. Lily jumped while hearing those words.

My little Lily.

That was the way Sirius used to call her before she became James' girl. After that, Sirius had suddenly given up all his flirting manners towards her, all his teasing, provoking, behaving with her like the womanizer he actually was. He had started calling her Evans, and talking to her only when it was strictly necessary, for example when he needed to copy some Potion essay.  
And Lily, who had always thought she despised Sirius, had found herself completely destroyed by his behaviour, without understanding _why_.  
At first she had tried to convince herself that was just a pride matter: being trashed that way had been a hard stroke for her stubborn nature. But when she had became aware that every single moment spent with Sirius, moments that, by the way, were becoming rarer and rarer, was like a treasure for her, and that she kept on thinking about it for hours, she had realised that something was wrong.

That was why, after six months of doubts, Lily was there in that corridor humbling herself with that pathetic love confession, instead of finishing her homework or spending time with James.

-Get off those slimy hands of yours… - Lily hissed always holding firmly his wrists. - And also.. I thought you'd given up using that nickname a long time ago.

Sirius smiled smartly, bemused for her angry but stirred voice.  
-And I thought you've always _wanted _me to give up using it.

-What if I didn't? Now let me _go_. - she snapped.

- For heaven's sake! - Sirius exclaimed incredulous, rolling his eyes while letting her go. She withdrew with a jolt, and started combining her hair.- You know, Lily, I think we lost track of what this conversation was supposed to be. First you _slap _me, then you _insult _me, finally you get mad if I _touch _you! This is sure the _most dreadful _love confession I've ever received..

- Well it's _my _damned love confession and I do it however I want!

- _Excuse me_ if I'm involved, then! Excuse me if right now I'm completely stunned that James' crazy and stubborn girl has just come here telling me she _loves _me and smashing into smithereens my universe, excuse me if I still haven't the slightest idea of what the hell I could tell her in reply!

They were both quite upset, in that moment, and had to take deep breaths and avoid to look at each other not to make that conversation end up in a magical duel.  
They stayed in utter silence for near a minute, then Lily turned to him.

-I'm going to the dormitory. It's late. I suppose all this was stupid, a total waste of time. - she was serious now, not angry, not upset anymore.

-Well, I'm glad you consider talking to me a _total waste of time_, my little Lily…

- _Don't_ call me like that! - she exploded - not anymore.. - she added then more sadly. - Good night and sweet dreams, Black.

She made another attempt at going away. But Sirius reached her again.

- Wait, wait, _wait_! - he grabbed her arm again, more softly though, and this time she didn't even try to get rid of him. Instead, she gazed at his hand helplessly. - Now it's _my _turn to speak, here!

- Have other complaints about my _dreadful _love confession? - she tried to be ironic, but now _he _was too serious to keep on kidding.

- I just want to know: what was your _purpose_?

- My _purpose_? - she asked, getting upset again.

-Yeah, right. Your purpose, Evans. Because I don't think you came here just to tell me what you've told me to then go away as nothing had happened!

- I thought _you _were going to do that! - she smirked, imitating Sirius statement after the wand-episode.

- Whatever, maybe I _was _planning to do that. But now I'm _not_.

- But I _am_! - she yelled at him - Listen, Black: I repent having done this. I don't know what on Earth has caught me, but now it's over. I suppose your inexistent answer to my inexistent question is a '_no'_. So you're always the bastard womanizer you're, and I'm always the Pottergirl who will marry James. And now, if, how I suppose, all this looks fine to you, I'm going.

This time Sirius let her walk trough half the corridor before stopping her.  
-And what if I told you all this _doesn't _look fine to me? - the statement was thrown there, rather casually, but with an astonishing sincere voice by Sirius.

And Lily stopped.

-What do you mean? - she asked without turning back.

Meanwhile, Sirius was walking slowly to reach her.  
-I mean.. what if I told you something like "I love you too, my little Lily"? What would happen in that case? Would you leave James? Would we get together? I don't think you haven't considered the consequences of your action. Or you just supposed my answer was going to be 'no' in any case?

Lily was completely frozen. Actually, she _didn't know _what she had previously intended to do after telling him those _damned _words. In a way, she _hadn't _considered the consequences of her action, to use Sirius' words. And right now she didn't think telling that to him was a great idea. So she remained silent. Since she made no attempt to change her position, Sirius had to be the one walking around her, to be able to see her face again. He examined it, but it was almost impossible to state what was streaming through her mind.  
"And they say the eyes are the mirror of your soul.." thought Sirius annoyed, staring at her blank expression.

- Lily… or Evans.. You choose it.. - he began, trying to catch her gaze

- _Evans_, thank you.- she said proudly.

- Right. Evans, you know. You _love _James. I _respect _James. James _loves _you and _respects _me. See where this is going? _Me _and _you_, this could just never be. Because it's _wrong_. - he finished like he had been talking to a three-years old child. - You know you should never have come here telling me those things, don't you?

- I know.. - she replied completely humiliated. Another time her stubbornness had disappeared. She looked more like a subdued slave. But, by the way, that was Sirius' power.

The sight of Lily in such a way didn't leave him untouched.  
He placed his hand on her shoulder, stroking briefly her neck. Despite the sweetness he felt for her, he couldn't drop completely his ambiguous attitude.  
-You weren't hoping we could have a _story_, were you? - he asked with a cruel smile.

Lily covered her eyes with both her hands, and the moment after she was hiding her head in his neck.

-I _don't _know… - she breathed, still a hint of anger in her voice. - And _don't _touch me.

- Not to be monotonous.. But.. _You're _the one touching me right now. - Sirius laughed nervously, removing his hand from her shoulder. But she remained still buried in his neck.

- I never say _I _couldn't touch you. - she snapped back. Then she broke away suddenly. But with a quick movement he circled her neck with his entire arm, pulling her beside him, in the same playboy-ish way he used to do it six months ago. That sudden closeness added instability to the situation, if possible.

- You know, little Lily, you're driving me crazy this evening…and do not even try to complain about the 'little Lily' thing.. - he ordered her, seeing she had opened her mouth to say something. She obeyed.

-Fine. I see we're starting to understand each other. Now, since you cannot answer me, let's make this experiment. - he turned to her, his eyes fixed in hers, no tracks of shame on his face.

-_I love you, Lily._ - he proclaimed dramatically - I've been loving you from the very first moment I saw you. Shall you become my girlfriend? If you say yes, I will be happy for my entire life.

-You're the most _bastard _womanizer I've ever encountered, Black. - Lily replied, still uncertain whether she had to laugh or to cry about that performance.

-Ok, I'll take this as a 'yes'. - he was smiling. That _bastard _smile. - Then, we may go and proclaim the sweet news to the others, James in primis. Or this wasn't what you wanted? And stop calling me _Black_. That's so _formal_!

- All right. You like to act, _Sirius_? Well, lets act! - Lily was smiling even more wickedly than Sirius, if possible. She pushed his arm away to be able to move in front of him, their noses inches apart, their gazes locked. - If I am your girlfriend, then _kiss _me.

Sirius stared at her for some moment, then laughed loudly.  
-You know I'm perfectly capable to do it. Don't provoke me, little Lily.

-If you're capable, _do _it.

That was definitively a challenge. And Sirius accepted it.

The moment after, he pressed his lips on hers, without touching her in any other parts.  
Instantly she pushed him away.

-Hell! Are you _mental _or what? - she yelled furiously.

Sirius couldn't contain the laughter.  
- _You _asked me to do that! I just obeyed my girlfriend.. - he winked.

But Lily looked like she wasn't listening at him.  
-I've just cheated on James… - she was whispering to herself, a scandalized voice.

- Ah ah! Yeah, exactly. And I suppose you've enjoyed it quite much. - that teasing game seemed eternal. But Lily wasn't the one going to interrupt it.

-Honestly, Black. - she affirmed, her hands on her hips - I would have expected something _better _from a trained one like you.

-Aha. I see what we are trying to do here. You want another kiss. Well, I suppose since you're my girlfriend I cant refuse to do it, can I? - he murmured while moving closer.

-No you cant. - she replied grabbing the sleeves of his uniform

- Perfect.

And Sirius kissed her again. She didn't push him away, this time, her hands still on his arms. He stroked her hair softly, and unable to contain a gleam of passion, he licked her lower lip. But before she had the time to react, he himself broke the kiss unexpectedly.  
In the moment he looked at her red face, he remember what he had apparently and pathetically forgotten.  
_He was kissing the girl of one of his best friends.  
_They both seemed out of their selves, all caution thrown to the wind.

-Now, Lily - he tried to sound perfectly calm when he wasn't at all - I suppose our love-storyis becoming too _binding_, don't you find? Sorry, but I'm tired of you. Let's end this here. - he concluded with a half-smile.

Lily was speechless, but she was experimenting a total chaos in her mind. She would have so gladly slapped Sirius for his _outrageous _behaviour, but on the other hand she was vying for another kiss. So she did both things.

First she slapped him with rage.

-This was because you're a _bastard _womanizer, if I haven't already told you.

He hadn't time to reply, that Lily was kissing him again, leaving him slightly amused. She broke away after a few seconds, but Sirius didn't let her escape from his hug.

-And _this _was because of what? - he whispered to her.

Lily reflected for a moment, than said scornfully  
-_This _was just because three is the perfect number.

- Oh, how strange. I've always thought it was _seven_.. - he smirked while leaning on her.

-It's _three_. _Three_, Black, and don't you dare..

But it was too late. Sirius lips were already on hers. All that stunt they had pulled out, and she still was convinced of being helplessly in love with him.  
Sirius broke away, and then kissed her again. Just a whisper from his lips.  
-Five..

She pushed him away.  
- I hate you and _myself _for doing this. - she was at the breaking point.

He grabbed both her hands, and brought them to his lips.  
-Lily.. Remember that this can just never be. _Never_.

But she kissed him again.  
Six.

Sirius interrupted the kiss.  
-Kissing it's not right the kind of thing I usually do with the girl I've just ditched.. - he smiled-..and also not right the kind of thing I _should _be doing with James' girlfriend.

- Black? - the expression on her face was both stupid and humourless. - If I marry James, can I cheat on him with you whenever I want?

Sirius laughed heartily.  
-Of course, my little Lily. I will be at you service 365 days a year, 24 hours a day.

She leaned forward to kiss him again, but he stopped her.  
-Ehy. Save that one for later. It's the seventh one, the perfect one. The _last _one. You don't want to waste it in such a way, I hope.

Lily was sure that a kiss given to him couldn't _possibly _be defined wasted, but what she said had nothing to do with that topic.  
- You're not telling James, are you? - there was a kind of fear in her voice, but also something different, in between pure joy and terrible regret.

-Well, I suppose I wont tell him, unless I'll have the strong desire of being killed instantly with an Avada Kedavra.. - he smiled messing up her hair and stepping back.

She smiled, quite sadly tough.  
-I _do _love you. - she repeated.

He felt like having been wounded.  
-You should forget that. - he said severely.- _Really_.

-But how can I? - Lily asked as he could actually give her a satisfactory answer. But he was already leaving, and she could see only his back and his beautiful black hair.

He stopped, and turned to her with a strange smile.  
- You could just entrap in a Horcrux the part of your soul that loves me. I suppose that would work. Though, you don't seem the most suitable person to do such a thing, I guess. - he laughed.

- In a _what_? What the hell are you talking about, Black? - she almost had to yell to let him hear his voice, since he was going further and further in the corridor.

-Ha. No matter, Lily, just drop it. That's quite dark stuff, I wont explain it to children. Then see you for the seventh kiss, _Pottergirl_.

- Ehy, Black, you want to know a thing? _Fuck you_!

That was the shout he heard before disappearing behind the door.

**The End**

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**Author's notes:** Well, I've always had an infatuation with Sirius/Lily. I hope I'm not the only one.. Who knows.. For the Horcrux thing: I'm not going to explain what I'm talking about because it's a Half Blood Prince spoiler. If you really want to know, just read HBP… 

I received a sort of flame for this fic I guess.. Ok I have to say that the couple is quite unusual and could be irritating, I'm sorry - so please, if you've read and you haven't found this dreadful, let me know.

Swamp-eyes


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